Instead of them sitting next to each other, they made me sit in the middle. Definitely a little odd.The footy started and it was just like three old friends hanging out.Lisa got up to go to the bathroom and she returned without her towel. So now I was sitting there between a chick in a red bikini, and a guy in a speedo, with a towel around him. But the towel wouldn't last long, within five minutes of Lisa losing her towel, Matt got up to go to the bathroom and he returned without his towel.Half time came and it was time for Lisa and Matt to make their move. Lisa started by asking how the Covid had effected my sex life? I replied that it definitely hadn't helped. Then Matt said that it had affected their sex life too. By now I think the three of us knew where this conversation was going. I played along and asked, as a couple, how had the restrictions affected your sex life?It was Lisa who replied, "We are very open-minded Dave." And as she said it her hand slipped under my towel. Only. He gasped as her immense weight compressed his body onto the bench and asked, "What is the safeword when I can't take anymore" ? She laughed and looked at him contemptuously, "There is no safeword David, you wanted to be squashed and trust me you are going to be" ! She reached into her bra and pulled out a mobile phone, "Now I have to make a call David so keep quiet and I won't have to move onto your face to keep you quiet" !"Yes he is here now I am sitting on him already, he ain't going anywhere. He is a lot smaller than I expected, this is going to be so easy". After a short pause she continued, "Yes the camera is running, he didn't notice it and I just wanted to check you still want to see him really suffering some real pain". Again a pause and after answering with a chuckle, "Oh trust me he will regret this big time", she hung up."That was your wife David, she suspected the advert was yours and has paid me handsomely to really hurt you and film your suffering. The camera is up.
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